No Really. You ARE Awesome

Ever notice, when someone pays you a compliment, you brush it off and say something like “Well I was going to do it anyway…” Or “I was going that way anyway..” Or even…”Well you’d do the same for me.”  Why is that?  Why do you think we can’t just muster up a simple thank you when someone says something to us that resembles a compliment?

The other day, my neighbour and I had some work done on our shared driveway. A new garden bed with some beautiful new plants, and we had the hedge trimmed. The fella who did all the work, he called me at work a bit later in the day and said that he’d blown all the leaves off my front lawn, and moved a few plants around to better locations and cleaned up a few other things (which was over and above what we were paying him to do). To which, of course, I replied with a wholehearted “Wow, THANK YOU!” to which he responded by saying…”I had the blower out anyway.”

Do you know that when you say something like that in response to a person showing you gratitude, it not only takes away from the great thing you did, but it also doesn’t give you the opportunity to be awesome (even if it means you being uncomfortable for a minute) and also, after doing all these great things for me, completely unsolicited, and then saying “I had the blower out anyway.” leaves me with the experience that I’m actually not that important and you would’ve done it for anyone.

See where I’m going with this?  When you do something for someone, you do it because you are a kind human being and you want to do something nice for someone. When that someone you did the nice thing for, wants to thank you. Please do not take that opportunity away from them. It isn’t about buttering you up, and it isn’t about making sure that you stay interested (if it happens to be someone you’re dating), and it isn’t for any other reason but to express gratitude.

Some might say the ability to express gratitude is an important characteristic.

I’m going to go out on a limb and say that accepting gratitude is actually a bigger deal.

So often, we are quick to brush off all the awesome that others see in us.

Can we not do that?

People of the world, are aching to contribute to each other. Some might contribute by doing something nice, others may contribute by expressing gratitude in regards to who you are for them, and how much they appreciate you.

Let them. Believe me, it’s as much for them as it is for you.

You both get to walk away feeling pretty damn awesome.

Okay?

Can we start today?

Great.

Thanks.

Rita xo

Comments

  1. I am the queen of denying compliments and accepting gratitude. My ex-husband used to get so annoyed with me when a guest would compliment me on the dinner I had cooked, and I would proceed to tell them why it wasn’t as good as it should have been. I’ve gotten better at accepting my own awesomeness, but there’s a way to go. In fact, I just had a lot of trouble typing the words “my own awesomeness.” Rita, we SO need the work you are doing to help us reconnect and appreciate and celebrate our awesomeness.

  2. In one way know I crave and appreciate recognition when a compliment comes my way, but I also am also aware of feeling embarrassed or undeserving about being singled out for recognition, because its hard to be humble and own your awesomeness at the same time.

    • Anne, I hear you. It is tough to take a compliment, but we do often get resentful if the acknowledgements don’t come. It’s an interesting place to look. If you know you’re awesome, the recognition doesn’t matter. And when you do get it, it’s welcomed. And what’s the embarrassment about? If you’ve done something great, and you do crave the appreciation, why embarrassed? I ask because I’m interested in that conversation. How we do things like this to ourselves. Funny how giving recognition is far easier than receiving it. Thanks for coming by here Anne.

      Rita

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 45 other followers

%d bloggers like this: